Here’s a slightly edited version of a letter that I am having to send to DirectTV. This is a hoop that you have to jump through to cancel an account if you’re not already on an account as an authorized user. Which I can see to a point, but they take it to the next level of stupid.
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attorney for my father, Midwest Chick’s Dad, account number XXXXXXX,
address: parent’s address, city, state zip, phone number XXXXXXXXX.
to this account as an authorized user as soon as possible so that I can cancel
this account. I am told that it can take
up to five business days after receipt of this documentation to process.
that I am having to jump through this particular hoop in such a stressful time
as my father is having to go into a nursing home, but that it is part of your ‘security protocol’. Because there has to be a plethora of people calling you up with the account number, address, email address, security code, and whatever else you need and are cancelling other people’s accounts.
I find it interesting that the alternative ‘protocol’
would be to have my dad on the phone giving verbal permission for me to handle
this account, because yeah, no one would ever just have their husband or a
friend stand in for this. Even if he was
on the phone to you, he wouldn’t know the answer to any security questions since
he has never handled payments for this bill nor would know anything about it. Because, nursing home, schmucks.
is not even an email account or fax number, only a snail mail option, just to
make sure that things go as slowly as possible a joke as well. I do note that it is a PO box as well so I can’t send a Fed Ex, only go via USPS. I hope more people discover your roadblocks
to cancellation and start leaving in droves, even if it takes them months to do
so.
which is the email address already attached to the online account (because I set it up with my dad’s permission), when I have been added as
an authorized user (although I’ve been handling it for the last two years) so that I can try to expedite the closure of this account
since I am also having to do this long distance. If
you wish to slow down the process further in order to get that one or two more
month’s worth of subscriber’s fee, snail mail Midwest Chick, address, city, state, zip.
PS. Please note that this is not to the person who is actually having to do the processing because I’m sure you find it as onerous as I do. I do hope this makes it up the line a bit.
Midwest Chick's Place 
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